"...borderline between what and what?!" Girl Interrupted

This is a question I've often asked myself. I have borderline personality disorder. So what am I on the border of? I guess I've thought of it in several different ways. The one I use most to explain my disorder to others is a paraphrase of what a psychologist told me.

Borderline between sane and insane.

Being borderline for me is like walking a razor's edge of sane or insane. Jim Carey said it well in one of his comedy acts. "The difference between sanity and insanity is... ...saying 'yes' to the wrong impulse." For me, it's not that I consciencely choose to do something that tips me one way or another. It's more like this; A sane person knows they are sane. An insane person doesn't know they are not sane. A borderline knows something is wrong but may not be able to put a finger on it.

The trouble is because borderlines have unstable moods, unstable self-image and unstable relationships, they are often misdiagnosed.

There is no cure for the disorder, only therapy which may include medication for depression or anxiety but mainly consists of dialectic behavior therapy. (Learning to say "no" to the "...wrong impulse.")

Instability in relationships as well as moods and self-image. Clinging to people when I am sad or depressed of feeling inadequate. Afriad they will leave me and trying to please them. Then feeling on top of the world and confidant depending upon which way you lean at that given moment.

A wonderful day could be ruined by just a small thing that causes me to react in the over emotional borderline way. Hyperness, anger, sadness, love. It's all extreme. There is no medium, no norm with a borderline.

So what am I borderline between? I have yet to find a clear answer to that.