Torn from Your Flesh

We've all experienced it.  It hurts and stings.  The feeling of having a band aid ripped from your skin when it's on a hairy area or stuck to the wound is like no other.  Now, imagine that band aid on your heart.

The concept of a soul-mate means marriage for many people.  I like to think of a soul-mate as the one who is your perfect match, no matter the gender.  They could be your marriage partner or the very closest friend who is like your own flesh.  Both the Bible (King David and Saul's son Jonathan) and "The Epic of Gilgamesh"  (King Gilgamesh and Enkidu the wild man) contain stories of people who were loved above the love of a woman and loved like the person's very own flesh.  In both these stories, the loved one was lost and the remaining person was grieved to his soul.  Death had ripped their soul-mates from their flesh.

I have experienced much loss in my life.  Friends, family and beloved pets have succumbed to death while I was helpless to do anything about it.  But all of those losses combined, each worse than the last, were nothing compared to what my heart endures now.

A moment of insanity. The spark of anger.  The stubborn, head strong act of rebellion.  All could have been avoided if I had just listened and gotten my medication on time.  Now, I pay the price.  The cost is the loss of my hearts' companion, my missing piece, my soul-mate.  Not only is my heart broken, it is crushed.  I feel the sting of the ripping away of one who was as my own flesh.  There is a raw, open wound and I am in agony with each breath. 

I'm not being overly dramatic either.  I am just saying how I feel and what is going on in my mind and my heart.  And with this I give a warning.  Always get help before it's too late.  Before you lose more than your ever thought possible.  Never let anger or sin or anything blind you to the fact that you need help.  Maybe then you can avoid this kind of pain.